| I will turn any living space in which I inhabit into a jungle just watch me | locked in an eternal battle against kudzu |
currently inactive. may or may not return at a later date, fully dependent upon if I manage to find that mythical artefact known as 'good health'.
they look like they're completely innocent but lady mayhem right there's been stepping all over my keyboard and mouse for about half and hour and my darling son tried to take a dive out the window when I cracked it for some fresh air earlier
my beloved gremlin daughter was chasing her tail so intently she chased it right off the side of a mattress
right off the edge
me: *gently cradles my cat's head after the fifteenth time she almost falls off the couch because she was excited and rolling around* you have no brain cells. none. your skull is completely empty.
her: *loud meow and almost falls over AGAIN while trying to shove her entire body into my hands*
I made the mistake of leaving one of my favorite succulents within cat reach while rearranging plants and the big cat ended up knocking off half of its leaves TT_TT
please enjoy these pictures of my strange daughter, who has apparently decided that the only acceptable place to nap in the house is under/on my pillows
the little cat's list of crimes grows by the hour:
-launched self across room to climb up human back like a tree to perch on shoulder for better vantage point
-tried to take chomp of marker cap
-stood on clipboard while human was actively attempting to write on it
-walked across keyboard in order to sniff at Weird Dust Speck on scanner
-scream at door
I won't lie and say that little cat suddenly deciding that human shoulders are a fun place to chill doesn't delight that little part of me that wanted to be like Morwen from the Dealing with Dragons series as a kid but at the same time I could do without her leaping off my desk to climb up my back like a tree with no more warning than the wiggle of the jumping machine being primed.
them claws be sharp.
yeah so guess who figured out how to perch on human shoulders now?
I foolishly put catnip in my basket while collecting spring harvestables and attracted a muncher!!
sweet boy likes to snuggle in the morning but only in the morning
ANYWAY I was looking through my old picture from long ago and look what I found!! my little baby girl as a little baby bean!!
it's going to be two years since we found her and her mama in our overgrown garden (and a also certain little kitten abandoned in the woods that's grown up big, strong, and with an attitude after weeks of nerve-wracking bottle-feeding and fretting!!) in july!!
A List Of The Small Cat's Crimes, Commited Over The Past 24 Hours:
almost knocked over an entire shelf of plants at 4 am
climbed up on the window sash in order to chew up the tips of an aloe plant shortly afterwards
uprooted two aloe vera plants
bullied the big cat. exiled from the room for her crimes.
screamed to come back inside the room. tried to run up into room when denied entry.
got stuck on the middle shelf of plants where the agaves live. agaves are very sharp. had to be rescued. learned no lessons from this.
stuck head in plant water container for tastey drinks. waterbowl water is apparently inferior. almost tipped over entire container.
continuing to bully the big cat by stealing the prefered window perch.
no doubt there will be more.
#my cats #you know I used to call the big cat 'delinquent' when he was a kitten for good reason #but I think she's long since outdone the feats of his youth #apparently I have a knack for ending up with gray tabby kittens who have exactly one desire in this world and that is to cause mayhem12 notes
a certain feline has learned a new and exciting trick where as long as a window is cracked open the width of three fingers stacked together, she can somehow wedge her head through, flatten herself into a pancake-cat, and shove the window open just enough to squeeze her body completely through to escape
she cannot, however, figure out how to get back inside. and once she's out, she seems to completely forget that she's a squishy little spoiled indoor cat, not a roaming feral that doesn't know what a bed is. so that's fun.
first thing I wake up to this morning is little cat repeated dropping and chewing on what I can only assume to be one of her own teeth
little girl. baby cat. why.
#my cats #teeth #while I would prefer that none of the cats managed to like... break a tooth or something I do hope it's at least her own tooth #because if not #how the hell did she get it #actually for that matter if it is hers how the hell did she manage to break it??? #why are cats like this??5 notes
naughty cats get socks yeeted at them for their crimes
photography practice with the kitties!
MURDER TIME. DEEPLY OFFENDED. HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME.
(the bandanas were very loosely tied, easily able to be removed by both cats, and weren't even on either of them for a full minute. both cats enthusiastically played with the discarded bandana afterwards. only big gremlin, who is an absolute drama queen, seemed offended at the lack of dignity. his wounded feelings were quickly soothed by a generous offering of catnip.)
I'm just over here trying to work on my computer but got distracted by a weird loud almost sneeze-like noise and turned around to see the little cat sticking her Entire Head into the container my sole air plant was soaking in and trying (failing) to drink the water out of it
#it's bad enough that she'll stop at nothing to drink the paint water/the actual paint itself #and always wants to uproot or eat the other plants #but bothering the air plant while he's bathing?? #what did steve ever do to you huh? #my cats #the smaller gremlin #she's still so very dumb but I love her so5 notes
I have got to get some screens for my windows because the second I crack them open this happens
that is a very wobbly shelf that doesn't take movement well!! the last time little girl jumped on that exact shelf she broke like three pots and scared herself into a puffball. apparently she's forgotten that now that six months have passed.
the saga of my cats "helping" me whenever I try to do literally any kind of art/crafting ever-
drawing: little cat tries to steal pencil/pen/marker directly out of hand. sometimes takes a swipe at the moving drawing utensil. big cat naps on sketchbooks.
painting: big cat tries to drink paint water with a single-minded obsession. little cat tries to drink paint water and eat the actual paint. both cats will start to step on canvas unless shooed away. little cat tries to eat paintbrushes at all times.
crochet: the yarn is slain. crochet projects in their entirety are banned from little cat's view because that's how you get destroyed balls of yarn. big cat behaves so long as the yarn is kept away from face and no dangling ends exist.
embroidery: big cat will not stop trying to climb into embroidery kits to take naps. why. there are so many needles in there. little cat is completely banned from any room where embroidery is taking place because she tries to eat everything.